The truth whispers to me, and sometimes it screams at me. It resides in my soul and navigates me through life. There are times when I fear the truth -- I don't want to see it, hear it, or acknowledge it. Sometimes I feel that if I ignore the truth I will be better off than if I face it. But in reality, ignoring the truth results in suffering.
Here's what's crazy: I pray for clarity so that I might recognize the truth; I see clearly, and then I dismiss it as though I never saw it. I recently experienced a heart-wrenching break-up with a man whom I swore was my soul-mate. I prayed, "If this relationship isn't for me, please show me." God showed me again, and again, and again. At first, He whispered. Then He spoke. Then He screamed. Then -- it was over. The door of the relationship shut. And I was left out in the cold.
I'm still out in the cold gathering my bearings and picking up the pieces of my broken heart. I'm not grieving the loss of a relationship; I'm grieving the loss of a fantasy. I was addicted to the fantasy of the relationship. The reality - the truth- was a hot mess.
I've learned a few things about myself. I learned that I abandoned myself for a man's attention. I learned that I sought fulfillment from an external source rather than finding everything I need within me. I learned that the truth is always revealing itself to me. All that is required of me is to look Truth in the eye and say, "I see you. I hear you. I will follow you. Thank you."